They occupy my country

So, the other day I was burried in my books – studying for the very last exam (Yeah bitch, I passed with glory!). I just couldn’t find my peace. My mind was elsewhere, so what do I do? The worst thing possible, of course. I oppened firefox and said to myself: “Just a little bit, just so I relax my worried mind…” The mouse arrow slowly approached overly abused icon for ebay. Here we go again. In nanosecond I was lost in a rush of internet shoping. Bags, shoes, clothes, clocks, chairs, nail wraps, ice cube makers,… You name it – I already bought it.

This time I fixated myself on a fictional need of something studded. I saw this gorgeous Zara studded ankle boots and tottaly fall in love. Unfortunately I’m broke and I don’t know if you guys noticed, but Zara is getting really really expensive. So normal reaction was to search for the most accurate fake there is and hope it’s as cheap as it gets. I get really creative in my search for desperately desired items. I feel like an economics reasearcher, pasted onto monitor, deeply concentrated, never bothered by the surroundings.

And suddenly I see something! What do we have here?! Ohhh so… so you are telling me, you are selling topshop studded boots in my size and the bidding starts at £2? It’s like message send from above – this auction was created for me! OK – I start bidding. £3. And then ebay automatic bidder is on the move – you know, when you just put the highest amount of money you’re willing to spend on the item and then ebay does all the work bidding for you and playing mindfuck with all the other buyers, yes that’s it. My crazy eyes are piercing the numbers on display. I’ve been outbidded. Damn! I do it again. £5. This chase of a rabbit continues till I reach £9. I’m the winner! The feeling of affiliation steps in. The shoes and I are one. We belong together. I’m gonna fight for them! Mine! All mine! They are my country, invaded by unknown enemy forces attacking me from the other side of the vast internet and I’m gonna protect them with my credit card till the end of days.
Then I return to my notes. Glad. Satisfied. And then racional part of me steps in after being brutally bounded and silenced. “This can’t go on… You did it again. You have to control yourself. But what’s done is done. Just promise me, you won’t go pass the amount of £15,” it says. Yes. Yes I promise. I’m ashamed.

But then the phone rings. And you know it’s a smart phone and that’s why it knows. It knows when my shoe country is invaded. It rings and my mind goes wild. I run like my ass is on fire. That bitch! She dared to bid against me! And it’s only 20 minutes till the end of an auction!
After 20 minutes I was the ultimate winner. For the price of £29 and the postage was £12. “There you go! I told you you have no control!” said the rational part. “But… but that escalated so quickly, I didn’t even noticed the price!” I said saddened. And then I realised  I am one pair shoes richer but I’m probably gonna eat grass for the rest of the month.. This month I also purchased two other pairs of shoes, earrings, a dress and probably some other stuff I don’t even remember anymore. This really can not go on! So I’m open for solutions, thinking about new ways how to be fashionable, but not wasteful..


7 responses to “They occupy my country

  1. Omg, kok obožujem tale post. Od prve do zadnje besede je kot da bi brala en awesome roman a la Sophie Kinsella. 🙂 Js tud ne morm nehat ko enkrat začnem biddat na ebayu.
    Pa čevljčki so čudoviti 🙂

  2. I think I’m pretty much your blog’s biggest fan ever, now. Either that, or we’re just twins, brains cut from the same cloth. Each month, I end up blowing loads on what? I can’t even remember now. I have to resort to taking my credit card out and leaving it in my dresser at home, for fear of crossing upon a too-good-to-be-true sale while out…. unfortunately, I’ve memorized the card’s number.


  3. Pingback: We used to leave the blue lights on and there was a beat | pitypartyforlesspopular·

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